I have decided to share the highlights (and lowlights) of my year here for a few reasons.
Reason number one is that I think it is important for people to realize that I am a complex character. I have noticed over the years that people often think spiritual teachers and healers are "perfect". We have it all together, our families never fight, we never get angry, we don't swear, and we never eat cookies or drink beer. These viewpoints typically cause people to watch their language around me and avoid inviting me to bars. While I appreciate being respected, it tends to lead to a rather lonely social life. After all, who
wants to hang out with that guy?
I can remember moments all through my adolescence and young adulthood when I held these views about my own spiritual
teachers, healers, and mentors. This was back when I had grown up on super hero cartoons where the overarching theme was "good guys fight the bad guys". Good versus evil. The moment when I realized that each person I idolized was a fallible human being was the moment that they lost their luster in my eyes. One by one, I lost all my role models.
Having grown since high school and college, I realize that there are not really any "good guys" or "bad guys" in the world. Everyone gets angry and everyone makes mistakes that cause them to violate their own moral code, to some degree. That is karma. Whenever we profess belief in a way of living, we will be given chances to test our beliefs. The choices we make in those times of testing show us the truth of our convictions, whatever they may be.
What I think then, that makes true spiritual teachers stand out, is how they handle adversity. Now, whether I am a "true" anything is up to others to decide. What I can say is that I strive to handle my wins and adversities with some modicum of grace, and to look for an opportunity for self-evolution in every negative experience. I can fully admit that there are times when it takes me longer to see that opportunity than others. Sometimes things happen and I feel that the best way for me to heal is to just feel how I feel, even if it is awful. Sometimes I need to give myself permission to break down and cry. If I make a mistake (and I will, because I am human and not a robot) I own up to it, apologize, and try to correct things.
I think an essential point of being a good healer or spiritual teacher is to be honest with yourself and others. Building on that honesty
is the need for me to follow and model the path of living that I recommend to others. Honesty and authenticity form the foundation of my practice in Ayurveda. In this spirit, I am sharing the best and worst of my year with all of you. I hope that my best shows my life as I see it: a spiritual journey that is also fun and balanced. I hope that my worst gives hope to others who may be able to relate.
I know it’s long. A lot happens in a year. Feel free to skim. It's mostly photos.
The Best of 2013
Reason number one is that I think it is important for people to realize that I am a complex character. I have noticed over the years that people often think spiritual teachers and healers are "perfect". We have it all together, our families never fight, we never get angry, we don't swear, and we never eat cookies or drink beer. These viewpoints typically cause people to watch their language around me and avoid inviting me to bars. While I appreciate being respected, it tends to lead to a rather lonely social life. After all, who
wants to hang out with that guy?
I can remember moments all through my adolescence and young adulthood when I held these views about my own spiritual
teachers, healers, and mentors. This was back when I had grown up on super hero cartoons where the overarching theme was "good guys fight the bad guys". Good versus evil. The moment when I realized that each person I idolized was a fallible human being was the moment that they lost their luster in my eyes. One by one, I lost all my role models.
Having grown since high school and college, I realize that there are not really any "good guys" or "bad guys" in the world. Everyone gets angry and everyone makes mistakes that cause them to violate their own moral code, to some degree. That is karma. Whenever we profess belief in a way of living, we will be given chances to test our beliefs. The choices we make in those times of testing show us the truth of our convictions, whatever they may be.
What I think then, that makes true spiritual teachers stand out, is how they handle adversity. Now, whether I am a "true" anything is up to others to decide. What I can say is that I strive to handle my wins and adversities with some modicum of grace, and to look for an opportunity for self-evolution in every negative experience. I can fully admit that there are times when it takes me longer to see that opportunity than others. Sometimes things happen and I feel that the best way for me to heal is to just feel how I feel, even if it is awful. Sometimes I need to give myself permission to break down and cry. If I make a mistake (and I will, because I am human and not a robot) I own up to it, apologize, and try to correct things.
I think an essential point of being a good healer or spiritual teacher is to be honest with yourself and others. Building on that honesty
is the need for me to follow and model the path of living that I recommend to others. Honesty and authenticity form the foundation of my practice in Ayurveda. In this spirit, I am sharing the best and worst of my year with all of you. I hope that my best shows my life as I see it: a spiritual journey that is also fun and balanced. I hope that my worst gives hope to others who may be able to relate.
I know it’s long. A lot happens in a year. Feel free to skim. It's mostly photos.
The Best of 2013
1. Spending New Year's in Ocean City. We played skeeball, took photos, drank hot coffee and chai, collected seashells, and hung out on the beach in our winter coats. It was freezing cold and we loved it. We practically had the whole place to ourselves. We also drove to Assateague Island to see the wild horses. Of course, I played the song “Wild Horses” by the Rolling Stones the whole time we were there.
2. Backpacking in Isle Royale, Michigan...30 miles in 3 days! I have already written about this, so I won’t repeat myself too
much. The whole experience really showed myself and my family what we are made of, and what we found inside us was some amazing physical and emotional strength.
much. The whole experience really showed myself and my family what we are made of, and what we found inside us was some amazing physical and emotional strength.
3. Realizing just how far I've come. When I first started life on my own, I struggled. I was so poor that I couldn't afford to keep the electricity on in my house. I collected old phone books from neighbors and friends and burned them in the fireplace to keep warm during that first winter (back when Virginia still had a winter). I only ate once per day at my local Waffle House because I had made friends with a waiter who loved me and fed me for free. Years of hard work and education have really paid off for me though. I have a career that I love, live in a great house that I own, take care of 7 rescue pets, and we never have to worry about having enough to eat or any utilities ever getting shut off. This year I was shopping for Christmas gifts for friends, family, and coworkers...and very excited that I could afford to give so many presents!
4. Zoo Day. Kris and I spent a very cold day at the Maryland Zoo in early December. All the arctic animals were out and there was still snow on the ground from the day before. It was amazing almost having the zoo all to ourselves. We got a personal lesson about polar bears and we even got lucky enough to see the elephants playing tug-of-war outside! I realize that many people think that zoos are cruel. I can see that point, and I don't believe we should be going into the wild and capturing animals just so people can stare at them. I don't think there is a person alive who could possibly love animals more than myself. But many animals in zoos nowadays
are likely to become extinct due to the environmental havoc we have caused. I think we owe it to these animals to help them survive in some capacity.
4. Zoo Day. Kris and I spent a very cold day at the Maryland Zoo in early December. All the arctic animals were out and there was still snow on the ground from the day before. It was amazing almost having the zoo all to ourselves. We got a personal lesson about polar bears and we even got lucky enough to see the elephants playing tug-of-war outside! I realize that many people think that zoos are cruel. I can see that point, and I don't believe we should be going into the wild and capturing animals just so people can stare at them. I don't think there is a person alive who could possibly love animals more than myself. But many animals in zoos nowadays
are likely to become extinct due to the environmental havoc we have caused. I think we owe it to these animals to help them survive in some capacity.
5. The Desolation of Smaug. I am a huge nerd and anxiously await the theatre viewing of each new installment of The Hobbit. I also love the Lord of the Rings trilogy.
6. Opening Health Revolution Herbal Supply. I was thrilled this year to become part of the talented healing group at Ruscombe Mansion Community Health Center. I fulfilled a lifelong dream of mine to have my own store that sells what I think are the best products for whole body natural health. I also love seeing patients in this beautiful space. We drink tea together and it feels much more like a living room than an office.
7. Beginning Ayurveda for Animals...and helping my first family in need to care for their pets during rough times. This year, I taught
Yoga Nidra meditation in exchange for $5 donations to my animal rescue project, Ayurveda for Animals (AFA). My project is not about giving Ayurvedic medicine to animals, as the name might suggest. It is about the philosophy of Ayurveda, which gets overlooked in the West. Part of Ayurvedic philosophy is to heal ourselves through compassionate action towards other beings. Helping others makes us kinder and less selfish. AFA is in Phase 1 of its existence, which is to provide financial assistance to families who need temporary help to care for their animals. Maybe the main breadwinner has recently been laid off at work, or maybe a pet gets hit by a car and unexpectedly needs a surgery that the family cannot afford. In these types of situations, AFA can provide financial help in the form of gift cards to local pet stores, or by covering a portion of the medical costs. Many people think about pets in shelters and helping them. I do that too, but we should put more effort into preventing situations where people are forced to give up their pets.
Yes, there are people who move and don’t bother looking for an apartment to rent that accepts pets. But people don’t always have control over their situations. Sometimes accidents happen and pet moms and dads suddenly have to figure out how they can afford an expensive surgery. Sometimes hard-working, responsible people lose their jobs. Being without a job for a middle-class family can mean choosing to feed the people or give up the pets. These are the types of scenarios I am looking to help out with. Keeping
pets out of shelters in the first place helps to avoid shelter overcrowding and can prevent thousands of pets from being euthanized.
Here are photos of a few the pets AFA helped this year:
Yoga Nidra meditation in exchange for $5 donations to my animal rescue project, Ayurveda for Animals (AFA). My project is not about giving Ayurvedic medicine to animals, as the name might suggest. It is about the philosophy of Ayurveda, which gets overlooked in the West. Part of Ayurvedic philosophy is to heal ourselves through compassionate action towards other beings. Helping others makes us kinder and less selfish. AFA is in Phase 1 of its existence, which is to provide financial assistance to families who need temporary help to care for their animals. Maybe the main breadwinner has recently been laid off at work, or maybe a pet gets hit by a car and unexpectedly needs a surgery that the family cannot afford. In these types of situations, AFA can provide financial help in the form of gift cards to local pet stores, or by covering a portion of the medical costs. Many people think about pets in shelters and helping them. I do that too, but we should put more effort into preventing situations where people are forced to give up their pets.
Yes, there are people who move and don’t bother looking for an apartment to rent that accepts pets. But people don’t always have control over their situations. Sometimes accidents happen and pet moms and dads suddenly have to figure out how they can afford an expensive surgery. Sometimes hard-working, responsible people lose their jobs. Being without a job for a middle-class family can mean choosing to feed the people or give up the pets. These are the types of scenarios I am looking to help out with. Keeping
pets out of shelters in the first place helps to avoid shelter overcrowding and can prevent thousands of pets from being euthanized.
Here are photos of a few the pets AFA helped this year:
8. Sebastian jumping out of the car at a red light to help an older gentleman struggling across the street with lots of grocery bags.
I have never been more proud of my son.
I have never been more proud of my son.
9. Noticing that my family spreads happiness wherever we go. We really do. We make people smile and laugh. We don't take ourselves too seriously. When we were Christmas shopping this year, I noticed that each of us was always especially nice to anyone who was working retail. Sebastian always helped the cashiers to pack items, Kris told jokes, and I offered to go and get them food or water...because I always want to feed everyone.
10. Adopting Ziggy. We thought he was going to be a foster, but then I had to teach him how to walk and to trust a person. He came to us having lived in a kennel. His legs had atrophied and it was hard for him to walk up stairs. He stole my heart. Now he lounges on our couch and goes hiking in the woods.
11. Honfest. Every summer, my sister-in-law comes down to Baltimore from Pennsylvania for this festival. We dress up and spend the day in Hampden taking pictures with strangers. It's always a blast. It's really freeing to be silly for an entire day.
12. Visiting Linganore winery. This local Maryland winery has been making superb wines for generations. I highly recommend a visit. The tastings are very affordable, the grounds are gorgeous, and the wines are excellent. I used to be a wine buyer way back when, so I do know my wine. Most people think I am crazy because “tasting” wine to me means swishing it, tasting it, and spitting it out rather than having a good excuse to get drunk. Yes, I drink wine. Not every day or even every week, but I enjoy sipping a glass of good red now and then. Remember, life is about balance. Most people aren’t meant to be ascetics.
13. Making new friends and deepening connections. This year, I have made connections with some truly wonderful people. I feel blessed to have coworkers that I love and friends who are true.
14. Finding a beach 20 minutes from my house.
15. My first professional hockey game.
16. My first state fair. After two weeks of hiking around the Midwest and cooking over our campfire, we went to the Minnesota State Fair. I had no idea that people still competed in contests for prize agricultural animals. That's what happens when you live your life on the coasts. I pet a lamb and watched equestrian competitions. And yep, I ate fried fruit salad on a stick. I am a big believer in experiencing life fully.
17. Mississippi headwaters. We walked across the headwaters of the Mississippi. As you can see, this mighty river begins as a shallow and narrow band of water that is easily waded through. If you are ever inclined to make a pilgrimage out here like we did, it is located in Lake Itasca State Park in Minnesota.
18. Art therapy. I participated in a collaborative art project through Witness Justice. It was an "exquisite corpse" style artwork, in which three people collaborate on a canvas. One person does their portion, then covers it up and passes it to the next. At the end, the entire piece is unveiled. I have only shown my portion here.
The theme of this project was "healing from childhood experiences". After the canvasses were completed, all the artists met one another at the unveiling dinner. We all talked about our contributions. It was an amazingly healing experience. The finished artworks, along with all of our artist statements, will be touring the country.
These are the feet of myself and my two collaborators, whom I met at the unveiling. It was an incredible experience to meet these beautiful ladies and bond with them over our shared artwork.
19. Starting my blog. I began this thing almost a year ago with my Spring Cleanse, and already 2,000 people are reading!
I have gotten so much unexpected support, and letters from people who say my blog inspires them and changes their life. Thank you to everyone who has been reading what I write. I hope I can continue in 2014 to be worth reading.
19. Starting my blog. I began this thing almost a year ago with my Spring Cleanse, and already 2,000 people are reading!
I have gotten so much unexpected support, and letters from people who say my blog inspires them and changes their life. Thank you to everyone who has been reading what I write. I hope I can continue in 2014 to be worth reading.
The Worst of 2013
no pictures of these...
1. Mice. We have mice in the house. We keep all of our pantry food in containers and don't make a habit of leaving dishes in the sink. I never see any mouse droppings and they don't eat our food. But every now and then, we see one scurry behind the fridge. I can't help thinking that they are cute. They are kept under pretty good control by the cat patrolling around and by my placing cotton balls soaked with peppermint oil in strange places. But since we won't use poisons or kill traps, they're still here. At least they're not rats and they pretty much keep to themselves.
2. Carpet peeing dogs. We will never buy an expensive rug. We have four dogs and two of them got potty trained this year. I am looking into rugs made from recycled plastic for purchase in 2014. They can be easily cleaned outdoors with the hose.
3. Growing pains. My business has grown quickly over the last year. The down side of growth is that my love for simplicity and small business operations often conflicts with the quantity of tasks I need to perform. The theme of this year for me has been learning to find a healthy work-life balance as my business grows so fast. During my 2013 emotional cleanse, I formulated plans to keep my old-school business approach and keep up with the growth in 2014. I hired myself a personal assistant and set new office hours that will allow me adequate time to continue teaching classes and workshops, which are two things that I love. Most importantly, I will now have more time with my family, who has been missing me a lot.
4. Aging dog. My dog, Foxy, has been getting older and having health problems this year. She has developed a sensitive digestive system and throws up at seemingly random times (another reason we need plastic carpets). I often have to help her get up the stairs when we head up for bed at night. Someone usually has to help her get up on the couch. She still loves hiking, though, so we take her as often as we can. I think people can learn a lot from animals. They age with more grace than we do. I know that Foxy has arthritis, but when she gets outside her love of running takes over and she can pull me for miles. I drew inspiration from her when we were hiking on Isle Royale and my knee blew out the first day. I really did.
5. Technological disasters. Technological problems in 2013 caused me to lose patients when I missed two week's worth of voicemails, emails, and text messages. In a separate occurrence, one of my emails got hacked (don't worry, not one with any patient info., but still one that I have used to communicate with students and colleagues for the last 10 years). I lost all of those communications and contact information for colleagues from around the world. I have to trust that when the time is right, we will all be put back in touch again. My teaching email got shut down and I am still attempting to forward communications to my current address before I lose access. I have had to make my peace with the possibility that I may not get it all done.
6. November 2013. I've already written about that in another post, but it definitely belongs in the list.
7. Thyroid problems. In early summer, I had begun to feel a tightness in my throat. I looked in the mirror and saw signs of an underactive thyroid in my face. The benefit of knowing Ayurvedic facial diagnosis is that problems can be caught before they fully manifest. The causes were energetic and not physical. I collaborated with my friend, Genevieve to heal. Through a combination of at-home crystal healing, energy medicine from Genevieve, and iodine supplementation, I was able to feel like myself again. Thank goodness.
8. Trying to do too much. Over the last year, I thought of many possibilities for workshops, classes, and fundraising for animal rescue, in addition to keeping my clinical practice growing. I can admit that I got too excited about all of them and could not keep up with all of the opportunities I created while maintaining a successful work-life balance. It really snuck up on me. I have noticed that it happens that way with my patients, too. We add things we love into our schedule, thinking we're fine, until one day everything comes to a head and we realize we have taken on too much. I had a 2-month period when I took on too much, largely fueled by the government shutdown and my trying to make up for lost household income. Having learned from this experience, I have planned out future endeavors in a much more harmonious manner. Never underestimate the value of "leisure" activities.
If you made it all the way to the end of what is probably my longest post ever, I hope you enjoyed it. The photos I posted are some of my favorites. Some are obviously art photos that I have published, while most are family snapshots. My photographic endeavors are healing to me and one of the ways that I keep myself anchored when things get crazy. Everyone who doesn't live in a monastery or ashram is "in the world" and has to deal with circumstances beyond our control. My point of sharing all this is to show that even in a life with ups and downs, we can continue to find joy and spiritual experiences. To me, hiking, playing guitar, singing, being silly, observing animals, and taking pictures are all spiritual endeavors. This year, I hope all of you make time for the things that feed your spirit.
Many blessing to all of you for health, happiness, and personal growth in the New Year!
-Michelle
P.S.- I should probably add this: I realize that, in the spectrum of awful events, my "worst" list is not too bad. There were some intensely personal traumas this year. I chose not to write about those events because they involve the personal lives of others who are close to me. I am not about to violate the privacy of people I love.
no pictures of these...
1. Mice. We have mice in the house. We keep all of our pantry food in containers and don't make a habit of leaving dishes in the sink. I never see any mouse droppings and they don't eat our food. But every now and then, we see one scurry behind the fridge. I can't help thinking that they are cute. They are kept under pretty good control by the cat patrolling around and by my placing cotton balls soaked with peppermint oil in strange places. But since we won't use poisons or kill traps, they're still here. At least they're not rats and they pretty much keep to themselves.
2. Carpet peeing dogs. We will never buy an expensive rug. We have four dogs and two of them got potty trained this year. I am looking into rugs made from recycled plastic for purchase in 2014. They can be easily cleaned outdoors with the hose.
3. Growing pains. My business has grown quickly over the last year. The down side of growth is that my love for simplicity and small business operations often conflicts with the quantity of tasks I need to perform. The theme of this year for me has been learning to find a healthy work-life balance as my business grows so fast. During my 2013 emotional cleanse, I formulated plans to keep my old-school business approach and keep up with the growth in 2014. I hired myself a personal assistant and set new office hours that will allow me adequate time to continue teaching classes and workshops, which are two things that I love. Most importantly, I will now have more time with my family, who has been missing me a lot.
4. Aging dog. My dog, Foxy, has been getting older and having health problems this year. She has developed a sensitive digestive system and throws up at seemingly random times (another reason we need plastic carpets). I often have to help her get up the stairs when we head up for bed at night. Someone usually has to help her get up on the couch. She still loves hiking, though, so we take her as often as we can. I think people can learn a lot from animals. They age with more grace than we do. I know that Foxy has arthritis, but when she gets outside her love of running takes over and she can pull me for miles. I drew inspiration from her when we were hiking on Isle Royale and my knee blew out the first day. I really did.
5. Technological disasters. Technological problems in 2013 caused me to lose patients when I missed two week's worth of voicemails, emails, and text messages. In a separate occurrence, one of my emails got hacked (don't worry, not one with any patient info., but still one that I have used to communicate with students and colleagues for the last 10 years). I lost all of those communications and contact information for colleagues from around the world. I have to trust that when the time is right, we will all be put back in touch again. My teaching email got shut down and I am still attempting to forward communications to my current address before I lose access. I have had to make my peace with the possibility that I may not get it all done.
6. November 2013. I've already written about that in another post, but it definitely belongs in the list.
7. Thyroid problems. In early summer, I had begun to feel a tightness in my throat. I looked in the mirror and saw signs of an underactive thyroid in my face. The benefit of knowing Ayurvedic facial diagnosis is that problems can be caught before they fully manifest. The causes were energetic and not physical. I collaborated with my friend, Genevieve to heal. Through a combination of at-home crystal healing, energy medicine from Genevieve, and iodine supplementation, I was able to feel like myself again. Thank goodness.
8. Trying to do too much. Over the last year, I thought of many possibilities for workshops, classes, and fundraising for animal rescue, in addition to keeping my clinical practice growing. I can admit that I got too excited about all of them and could not keep up with all of the opportunities I created while maintaining a successful work-life balance. It really snuck up on me. I have noticed that it happens that way with my patients, too. We add things we love into our schedule, thinking we're fine, until one day everything comes to a head and we realize we have taken on too much. I had a 2-month period when I took on too much, largely fueled by the government shutdown and my trying to make up for lost household income. Having learned from this experience, I have planned out future endeavors in a much more harmonious manner. Never underestimate the value of "leisure" activities.
If you made it all the way to the end of what is probably my longest post ever, I hope you enjoyed it. The photos I posted are some of my favorites. Some are obviously art photos that I have published, while most are family snapshots. My photographic endeavors are healing to me and one of the ways that I keep myself anchored when things get crazy. Everyone who doesn't live in a monastery or ashram is "in the world" and has to deal with circumstances beyond our control. My point of sharing all this is to show that even in a life with ups and downs, we can continue to find joy and spiritual experiences. To me, hiking, playing guitar, singing, being silly, observing animals, and taking pictures are all spiritual endeavors. This year, I hope all of you make time for the things that feed your spirit.
Many blessing to all of you for health, happiness, and personal growth in the New Year!
-Michelle
P.S.- I should probably add this: I realize that, in the spectrum of awful events, my "worst" list is not too bad. There were some intensely personal traumas this year. I chose not to write about those events because they involve the personal lives of others who are close to me. I am not about to violate the privacy of people I love.